So last night this happened.
Guess who did it? You're wrong if you guessed Kaleb which you probably did. Not the twins either. No, the spilled oats would be the work of James. Yes, grown-ups spill things too and contrary to popular believe, our spills aren't always in the form of red wine. Though (drink) mostly, they are. And broken wine glasses. Kids absolutely love witnessing these adult-induced disasters. If they happen to see it all unfold, their reactions - usually laughter and collecting all the siblings to bear witness to the mess - compounds our mounting irritation. And they NEVER let you live it down. Every single time one of them spills something, they'll be all, "Remember the time dad spilled the ENTIRE container of oatmeal?" reminding us that even adults aren't immune to mistakes.
This entire post is a bit of a mistake, actually. Today happens to be James's birthday and I've chosen this day to broadcast his faux pas out into cyberspace. As if the kids harping on it isn't bad enough. Sorry James. As long (drink) as we're talking about his birthday, though, I might as well share a particularly painful part of my morning with you. Have you ever wrapped presents with kids?
It's right up there with watching them decorate the Christmas tree or assist with baking. I have to look away. It's the tape that really gets to me. I don't particularly care how the finished product (drink) comes out - it's endearing to be presented with a gift clearly wrapped by a five year old. But watching them struggle with the tape is vexing. And the scissors too. The jagged edges of the wrapping paper, the severed appendages - it's all just too much. I can't watch.
We made it through the process with all twenty fingers still intact and the roll of tape only slightly mangled. And wait until James (drink) sees these wrap jobs! They just might make up for the spilled oats announcement.
Happy birthday James! Love, your crazy family.