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To All the Mamas

I came very close to writing the following as my post today: apologies readers. There's just no way I can get a post done today. My children seem to think Mother's Day means that I give extra doses of motherly attention and will NOT leave me alone. I give up. Mama out.

But James just took a few of them out to the pool and I think this might just be my chance. I'm guessing my time is limited because it's windy as hell and there's no way they can last too long in this weather. So set your expectations low for this one.

I have to admit, I'm not a huge fan of Mother's Day. It feels so contrived and everyone asks what I have planned for the day. As if I'm going to soak in a bubble bath with a mimosa and meditative white noise followed by a foot massage and nap. I can't even pee without interruption. So when people ask what my big plans are, I either lie or tell them the truth which is usually met with an embarrassed, "oh right. Sorry."

This year, though, Mother's Day does have its perks. I guilted Abigail into granting permission for me to post a selfie of us on my blog. She is very firm on her refusal to allow any photos of her to appear in my posts. I understand. She's 12. I'm embarrassing. And she doesn't want to be associated with the rest of her siblings. But today I played the Mother's Day card and compassionate soul that she is, she agreed. There was a caveat though. She insisted on a Snapchat filter. She said it would also help with my zit. Damn kids. She was right though.

It just about made up for Eleanor's 6:15 wake up call. I can't really blame her...there was an underwear emergency. Why she thought she would find a clean pair in my room, I have no idea. But I dragged myself out of bed, fetched her some undies, and told her I was going back to bed. I was close to drifting back off when Kaleb, Eleanor and Cynthia barged in SHOUTING "Happy Mother's Day!"

I pretty much expected an early invasion. But I did feel bad for James. I always do on Mother's Day. He wants me to have a relaxing day and made a valiant attempt to allow me to sleep in by sleeping in another room so as not to disrupt my slumber with possible (probable) snoring. #fail The funny thing is, he slept in the twins' room because they have been sleeping in Kaleb's room lately. And THAT'S WHERE ELEANOR'S UNDERWEAR IS. Yet, she (drink) found me. It's like a sixth sense or something.

Later, I was treated to several Mother's Day performances. For more about my feelings about shows, check out this post. It was cute and the team effort was appreciated. It was well worth standing outside on a freezing May morning to watch.

And of course, Eleanor had a solo act for me. I bet you're all getting a tad sick of all her videos. Try living in my house.

She really needs to be a little less inhibited, don't you think?

Moving on... (Drink) As a mother of five, I require a lot of advice from someone who is able to talk me off the ledge on a fairly regular basis. Actually, I need two people Besides James, who better to turn to than my (drink) own mother? She always knows exactly what to say even if it's not exactly what I want to hear. "You just have to laugh," is often her mantra. In the crux of the situation, I get annoyed by this advice. "How can I laugh right now? There's urine all over my living room and Cynthia walked in it and is tracking it through the house and it smells like a f*ck$ing subway tunnel." But see, now (drink) that story is hilarious. Moms are usually right. So I try to laugh, but some days it's harder than others. On Mother's Day it's easy though. Because despite the fact that my day is far from relaxing, I can tell they're really trying. It's like watching a three year old to do a puzzle. They know where the piece needs to go, but can't quite turn it the right way to fit it in. Like when Kaleb was trying to be helpful by getting his own drink and spilled milk all over the counter this morning, he was super apologetic. And Cynthia chimed in, "I'm sorry we ruined your Mother's Day." I assured her they most certainly had not ruined my day.

And Kaleb's attempt to clean the car created more of a mess to clean up between the wet clothes, rags, soapy bucket of water, and somehow spraying water inside the car. (There seems to be a Kaleb theme here.)

But that's funny, right? I can laugh today jut like my mom would advise. Their efforts are entertaining. And it's the thought that (drink) counts.

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